How do I love Thee

In these cynical times I doubt many will read about love but I thought I would give it a shot.

I enjoy showing my wife how much I love her. It is not an altruistic action though because of the deliciously good feelings I get from making her happy. There is nothing better than being able to surprise Sarah with the little things in life that she likes even if she might not know she likes them. Walking around Publix grabbing something I think she might fancy to create a microsuprise for her. Its like a game, trying to find new and creative ways to show her that I love her.  Not just that I love her but why I love her.

I think that’s a huge distinction that gets overlooked. Why do we love the person we are in love with? Of course you have big reasons, yea they make me feel safe, they are present, they help pay the bills, hold a job,  doesn’t beat me- all of these worthy, but baseline. A partner really needs to provide those basics to be considered a partner. But more than that, what makes her unique, special to you. What are the things that only you know about her, and how do you celebrate those intimate details. How do you show everyday that she is appreciated for all the things that make her more than the mom, the daughter, the wife! How do you demonstrate that she is the person that you adore before all others. If the answer is I don’t and i don’t really care, it may be time to examine where you are and what you are doing.

The strength of the relationships we have in life forge us. They bring us happiness, fulfill us and ultimately define our success or failure in life. No one is happy without a relationship. That might be a relationship with a diety, a pet, imaginary friend Steve, sibling, parent or if you are really really lucky someone that loves you. Because that is the essence of all that is important in the time we have between life and death.

Its an honor to make the person that makes me feel special feel special. To be able to take care of the one that takes care of everyone else. But its easy for me, I have one huge thing in my corner. I am head over heels, stupidly, lustfully madly in love with Sarah. So its such a pleasure to be able to show her how I know her.

And don’t get me wrong, we aren’t the Cleavers we have heated engaged discussion about everything. But its respectful and fun, I enjoy being able to provide some form of intellectual stimulation to this mental giant. Just like every couple we have our off days. But once we recognize a bad day in the making we talk it out. I think because of our separation we have gotten very good at that. What might be a 8 hour fight we compress into a 20 min thing that we try and fully vet before moving on.

And it works. I am loved. I love. My life is good. I am happy. The only thing that causes me real grief is coming to an end soon.

Do you love like this? If you don’t, wouldn’t you want to?

  1. sarah
    July 2, 2010 at 12:51 am

    I love loving like this! I love how the simple thought of holding your hand and just sharing a moment that we will have forever- makes clouds flee and the cares of the present vanish. I love being known to the core, yet being able to be asked to share my opinion on real issues- asked and listened to with interest and with the intent being so pure- to really gain my input and build to the conversation; not to just confirm that he already knew what my exact opinion on the subject would be before asking and therefore not really being interested in my actual response….. (terrible grammar!) I am truely, madly, deeply in love with my lover and besty friend-Mayb!

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